Aren’t you fucking dead yet

Poisoned you at dinner turned turkey burger sinner
Drowned you in the lake by mistake
You were allergic to nuts
Put them in your birthday cake at pizza huts

Stabbed you in the back
Throo you under a bus
Chopped you into bits
Pushed you down the toilet and flushed

Went for a walk white cliffs of Dover
Never meant to push you over
You gotta believe I never wanted you dead
Electric window chopped off your head

Killed you by accident with an iron
Smashed you in the face by mistake

Took you to the zoo
Fed you to the lions
It wasn’t my fault
Stuck by a lightning bolt

All this effort and your still not

Fucking dead

When I turn over there you are in the bed
Drooling and snoring

And live continues to be just as fuckin

Borin!